Teddy Bear
by Joflower
Summary: [oneshot songfic] 'I remember now... that night I thought I had buried.... I took one look at your face and burst into tears. I was the son she never wanted, and the son that tore your life apart...' [Momiji & Father fic]


_**A/N: **I do not own the characters in Fruits Basket or the Japanese song "Teddy Bear" by Ayumi Hamasaki. This is a one-shot song fic and the song "Teddy Bear" is so sad and sweet, it makes me want to cry! (in other words, it's worth downloading)_

**Teddy Bear**

You tucked the covers snugly around me and kissed my forehead. I looked up at you from a strange bed that wasn't mine in a house that wasn't ours. Tears began to gather in my five year old eyes as I remembered what happened to Mutti earlier that day.

"But don't worry Momiji-chan," you said soothingly, stroking my hair gently with your finger tips. "I will always love you. Otou-san will take care of you and love you twice as much as any other father could ever love his son."

I nodded my head to say that I understood… but at that time, I couldn't comprehend anything you had told me. I wanted to be a good boy, so I smiled a little to reassure you and show you that I loved you too.

"But I have to go now, Momiji-chan. Mutti will be waking up soon and she will need me by her side."

The tears that were accumulating in my large eyes fell down my cheeks and I flung my arms around your waist, crying from this fear of abandonment. I didn't want to let you go. I didn't know where I was or what was happening. I didn't want to be left here… alone.

"I'll be a good boy!" I cried. "I'll be a good boy, just don't leave me!"

I saw your eyes shine and shimmer with tears that dared not to fall as you laid me back down on the bed and began to tuck me in again. "Please Momiji-chan," you pleaded with sorrow-filled eyes. "Please do what Otou-san asks of you. I know it will be very hard for you Momiji-chan, but please…." You wiped away one of my tears from my cheek gently, ignoring your own that slowly begin to cascade over your pale cheeks. "Please be a good boy. Do as you're told. You will make Otou-san very happy."

_**You once said long ago  
**__**while stroking my hair,  
**_"_**When you wake up, there'll be  
**__**a nice present waiting for you  
**__**by your pillow."**_

The next morning I woke up… alone.

And I cried.

_**You weren't always  
**__**there for me,  
**__**but we could laugh together  
**__**at funny stories.**_

Months later, Mutti could smile again and so, you became happier too. You began to tell me stories about far away lands and people with magical abilities. You laughed a lot and it made me happy to see you smile. Soon, even I could smile and laugh at all things we shared together.

But as time went by, I grew and began to wonder how Mutti could keep living without really knowing the truth. How much longer would she have to live this ignorantly blissful lie?

_**But how can people regret  
**__**mistakes that they keep making  
**__**over and over again?**_

I didn't see Mutti for a while after 'IT' happened. I spent a lot of time moving between families in the Sohma Estate. I had a hard time fitting in, and when I did see Mutti, it was only as she was passing by my window when she went to see you at work. One time, I was playing outside with a bunch of kids––Cops and Robbers, I believe––and she just appeared in front of me. I froze in surprise and stared up at her with amazement. She just smiled at me and told me to be careful not to get hurt in our game. And then she turned her back to me and walked away. The rejection left me feeling stunned and hurt.

Two years or so had passed since Mutti's memory was suppressed; I was living with Hatori at that time. I remember when I peeked through the crack in the door I saw Mutti and Hatori talking. I remember the smile that spread across my face when I saw how well Mutti looked. She was smiling and her face was bright and cheerful; she was glowing. Hatori asked if she was ready for this.

Ready for what?

It was then that I noticed her stomach. It was growing. I wasn't stupid because I had seen some of Hatori's patients and I knew what the swelling stomach meant.

She was going to have a baby… to replace 'the one she never had'.

_**I remember now...  
**__**that night I thought  
**__**I had buried.**_

I started crying. I couldn't take it. It wasn't fair.

I ran to my dresser and threw open the drawers.

'_She never loved me! She never wanted me! She hates me! SIE HASST MICH!'_

I jammed two outfits into my little backpack and wiped the tears from my cheeks. No one wanted me here. I knew I should just leave and that way I wouldn't bother anyone anymore with my measly existence.

I opened my window and crawled out. The fall wind was cold and crisp on my skin. I pulled my little jacket tighter around me and marched forward from the building. I didn't know where I'd go, but any place would have been better than this one.

'_Sie hasst mich…'_

I rounded around the corner of Hatori's house and slowly made my escape across the lawn––when I saw you walking towards me. Towards Mutti in Hatori's house.

Otou-san…

I took one look at your face and burst into tears.

I was the son she never wanted, and the son that tore your life apart.

_Gomen… I'm sorry. I'm so sorry…._

_**You once said, long ago  
**__**while stroking my hair,  
**_"_**When you wake up there'll be  
**__**a nice present waiting for you  
**__**by your pillow."**_

You picked me up and held me against your chest next to your beating heart. You kept apologizing to me, over and over again, as I cried on your shoulder. You carried me back into Hatori's house and helped me undress—something you hadn't done in a long time. It felt like years. I knew I was old enough to dress myself, but I hadn't seen you in so long. I missed you and I knew you missed me too; so I let you do this one fatherly task to make yourself feel better. You were kneeling before me when you finished your duty and wiped the tears from my cheeks with your finger tips.

"Have you been a good boy, Momiji-chan, like Otou-san asked you?"

I watched your eyes as you spoke softly to me and nodded with a sniffle.

You threw your arms around me and hugged me tightly. "Thank you Momiji-chan," you whispered. "You have made Otou-san very happy."

You tucked me into bed like you had that first night you left me so very long ago. I wasn't quite as small anymore. You were crying as you beheld your little boy, growing without you. As I drifted off to sleep, you kissed my forehead and left the room.

_**I lay sleeping with my arms  
**__**crossed around my chest,  
**__**looking forward to the morning.**_

I snuck a peek of you as you were leaving my room, and promised myself that I would never again try to runaway. For your sake, I promised.

_**When I woke up, I found  
**__**by my pillow a teddy bear...  
**__**in place of you.**_

I never expected to find a Teddy Bear beside me as I woke up. I took the bear, knowing that there was still hope of seeing you again soon, and held the Teddy Bear close to my heart. I remembered your promise and silent tears of happiness glistened as they fell down my cheeks.

_**You once said, long ago  
**__**while stroking my hair,  
**_"_**When you wake up there'll  
**__**be a nice present waiting for  
**__**you by your pillow."**_

I remember your promise… I remember everyday.

And everyday, I will be a good boy, and hope to be with you again.


End file.
